Daily Prompt: We’re entering the final days of 2014 — how did you do on your New Year’s resolutions these past 11.75 months? Is there any leftover item to be carried over to 2015?
I predict 2015 will be a year of sorrow. My resolution will be to stay steady. I’m reading a book called Waking Up to What you Do by Diane Eshin Rizzetto. She talks about recognizing situations where we are automatically reactionary. Someone says a trigger, and we reflexively go into attack or defense mode and strike out. There is a brief moment of being, just as your mind is switching into reactionary mode, where you have a choice. Meditation and mindfulness are about catching this moment and halting there for a moment, to analyze exactly what’s going on. What’s causing the sense of danger or threat causing our hearts to race and the need to react? And after that moment, if we must explode, we now do it with recognition of what’s really happening instead of mindlessly. Eventually, we can catch and change the reaction, but the first thing is to learn to recognize that moment.
She also talks about right speech which is what you say and think about others. You can never know someone. All you know is what someone was like in the past. That’s your fantasy story for “who the person is”. That says nothing for who that person is standing in front of you.
The latter is a huge issue in my family. We’re all stuck in our childhood, where strange and threatening relationships were formed. And none of us is able to move past the automated reactionary treatment of each other from way back. The trick is to keep steady and have the strength of mind to move past that behavior when everyone else around me is still crazy, just goading me to lose it.
These are thing for me to work on for next year. As for last year, I think the new year came and went without a thought of anything but perhaps staying alive another year and trying to make the best out of it.