I woke up at noon today. That’s quite unusual for me. I think the cause was that I missed Hubby leaving for skiing. Usually the hustle and bustle of him taking care of Pup in the morning is enough to rise me, but today I fell asleep again thinking I had all the time in the world to sleep. Or maybe it’s the snowshoeing yesterday. It has my body aching.
When you’re working, the world makes your schedule. When you’re retired, you don’t have much of a schedule anymore so sleeping in till noon is fine (sheesh, on a Sunday too!), but after 2 1/2 years I still feel guilty. I suppose I’ve spent so much time in bed that I associate it with my pain and depression coming back, and I have some aversion to doing it.
We’re expecting another two-day snow storm, and I sigh looking at everyplace the icicles are starting to seep into our windows. One toilet is out of commission now because it leaks into the kitchen when flushed.
I want to go around the house and do a photoshoot of the gorgeous trees and the amazing icicles that are ice monsters encrusting and slowly consuming our house. But it means I have to stomp a path through waist-high snow just to walk around my house. It’s still not out of the question, but it may be if I don’t do it before the snow starts up again in a couple of hours.
This time of the year is tough in New England. As much as I try to get out every day, it still feels like a bit of a prison with everything shut tight and constant cycling through being buried in and then having to go outside and shovel and stomp our way back to connection to the world again.
Having Hubby home for gaming is nice, though. I got my wargame fix with a couple of rounds of Battlelore, and now we’re going to be playing an easier 2-person game called Babel. I find that when I’m high my sense of intuitive logic is enhanced. I can see the wargame board just like a chess board, identifying weak spots and going after them without leaving my men unprotected. I can keep my mind on the constantly-evolving strategy, depending upon the cards I get. Hubby, however, is much more aggressive and constantly goes after me for the kill, and then forgets who he left unprotected. His aggression makes him a better chess player, though. It intimidates me. Chess is a very psychological game, for sure. In general he’s a better game player.
With pot, though, I have a bit of an edge. I don’t stress out if I’m losing, which keeps my mind focused more on my move and less on being insanely pissed off at losing. It’s sweet to experience staying focused on what I need to do instead of whether I’m losing or not. That’s a life lesson, not letting emotions cloud your decisions, and not allowing myself to get upset or frustrated at gaming is good practice for control over my emotions.
After Babel, I’m not sure what we’ll play. We’ve decided that gaming is a good thing for us to do. Every game challenges our minds in different ways, and learning to play each game all over again is fun. It’s been a refreshing change of pace pulling the board games out.
I’m damned sick of winter, though, and I know we still have a couple more months of it. I should refocus my exercising to stomping out a path around the house and taking some photos, I really should.
wishing you warm weather inside
& gentle patience awaiting on spring
while enjoying a game or two :-)
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Thank you for your blessing, your presence is so sweet and calming.
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Pot helps me focus too–in writing, yoga, etc. Pot gives me clarity and mindfulness–it calms my constantly running mind!
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Yes!
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I used to play a lot of chess stoned, back when I used to smoke pot. Now that I’m pot free I play completely differently, generally I’m much more aggressive now (like your hubby).
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