Well, are you talking about going to bed last night and hoping I’d survive the night? Because here I am, voila! Actually, I’m not sure I go to bed hoping to survive the nights, so this probably doesn’t count.
Hubby has this way of leaving the stove on after he’s done cooking something. He thinks that turning the stove off is not an urgent task, so he leaves it on until sometime later, when all other concerns are off his plate and there’s nothing else to think about. I’ve had many an argument about this with him, and he’s better about it, although I still occasionally go downstairs and see that it’s on with nothing to do but burn the house down. I’ve stopped screaming at him about it, because, as he tells me, encouraging positive things works. Screaming criticisms doesn’t work.
So now, when I find the stove on, I quietly turn it off. Instead, I’ve gone to Home Depot and bought new smoke alarms; and fire extinguishers and ladders for every room.
He never screams at me when I leave dirty dishes in the kitchen. He thanks me when I wash my dishes, but he quietly cleans the kitchen even after I’ve left the entire kitchen full of dirty dishes, pots and pans, wrappings, orange peels, cans, etc. I can mess it up as much as I want and when he gets home, he quietly cleans it all up. I do get that he thanks me when I clean up after myself, but I still only do it 1% of the time. The other 99% of the time, my own personal servant does it for me and never resents me for it or mentions it to me.
When he first met me, I was living in my tiny house. I’d been there a year and hadn’t unpacked my boxes. Dishes only got washed when I was completely out of clean ones, and then only the ones I needed got washed. I explained to him that the house wasn’t clean because I’d been travelling. Eventually he caught on that the mess had absolutely nothing to do with travelling. The guy still married me.
For all of my ranting and screaming and cursing and whining at him about everything under the sun, he’s the same happy person every day, full of infinite forgiveness.
We met, moved in together almost immediately, and meshed into being a part of each other from that day on. There were no surprises, no arguments, no compromises, and no conflicts. He brings out the best I have to give the world. Marriage was just a legality for a love that was already permanent. It’s never changed.
Tell us about a time when everything actually turned out exactly as you’d hoped.
All It’s Cracked Up to Be